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When You Have to Get Through the Dark Night with Being Tired and Exhausted


A Conte

I have a cousin sister.
She is one year younger than me.
This is when I was 21 and she was 20.



She was worried about her future.
She was finished her second year of college.
She was attending architecture college in the metropolitan area.


It was too hard for her to study architectural design.
She felt that she could not do the job with her own ability.
And she was worried about her tuition and living expenses for the next semester.

She thought about taking off the school to work and going back later.
She thought about starting another major in another school.
Then She thought about how to make the cost.
So she thought about whether she would finish her school first.
Then again, she was worried about her tuition and living expenses for next semester.

She thought about what she would do for her living in the future.
Everything was tied to the tail.
There was no answer.


She grew up without seeing her father often.
Her mother was busy for doing business.
The people around her could not give her any helpful advice.
She was outwardly cheerful, but she was always lonely.

We were not meeting often.
I used to bother her so make her cry when I was a child.

I met her at home in the Lunar New Year and listened to her quietly.
And I started talking.
"What has been the best thing you've experienced in recent years? Let's talk about if even they are small or trivial."

The experience she felt was a part-time job that she had a few months ago. She was promoting a subscription to a broad-band internet connection service in a department store store, and she received a bonus because of the good sales performance.

I asked her why she seemed to be able to do such a good job, and she thought and said, "I explained well about the benefits of joining the service, and it seemed like it was easy for the guests to understand.” She liked to explain something to others and felt pleasure when people understood it well.

I simply put this together.
"Then you are good at explaining information to people and liking those things, are you satisfied with selling things with your skill?"

But she shook her head. She has seen her mother who sells merchandise, but her mother always been worried about selling sales and she was so busy with her business that she couldn’t enough time with her family. It was not what she wanted to be. She hoped that her own "explaining information" would not be directly linked to sales performance and money.

So I was able to organize it once more. She is good at explaining information to people and likes it. But she didn’t like selling, earning money, and raising sales performance even she can do them well. I asked her to give me another experience that was joyful and rewarding besides promoting internet services at department stores.

She noted that she had private tutoring for her college tuition and living expenses. She felt a sense of accomplishment by teaching something easy to others and seeing how they responded well.


She easily explained the information to others and taught it, and when the person grew up there, she felt satisfied. And she did not want sales performance, monetary compensation much.

I asked her to choose one from three jobs that match her aptitude, ability, and self-satisfaction that we have talked about so far.

  1. Various saleswoman: She has the ability, but it was not matched on her self-satisfaction.
  2. Private tutor: She has the ability but it was not matched on her self-satisfactaction.
  3. Public Education Teacher: Both were available and matched.



I continued the story.
"You may or may not do a saleswoman, you may or may not be a tutor, you may or may not be a public school teacher, and it is okay to do anything and not do anything."


"The important thing is not whether you are going to get a job or not, but in the process we've talked about so far.
You have to find your own pursuit in the little experience you have made.
And whatever you choose, you have to think based on those insights. So that no matter what happens in the future, you can go on steadily and constantly.
This is my opinion."


Think about what we’d talked when you have to get through the dark night with being tired and exhausted
There is a star floating in it.
Whatever happens, it will reveal the way you go.


And we did not contact each other for 10 years since we had the last talk.
I have heard from my mother some time ago.

She quit her college of architecture.
She prepared for new college entrance examination to become an elementary school teacher.
She applied to a local college of education where she could go from her scorecard without any difficulty and passed it surely.
Tuition is solved by her scholarship, tutoring and part-time job.

After graduating from the college, she applied to a school in the countryside, unlike other teachers who were desired to go to the big city.
She really enjoyed the elementary school teacher.
She was praised and favored by everyone inside and outside the school.

Previously she was not confident in her appearance.
But when she liked and focused on her work, nothing could stop her glittering charm.
She was proposed to the male teacher at the same school.
It turns out that his uncle was the principal of the school.
The principal also liked her.

She got married with blessing.
It is said that she becomes a mother after a few months now.


My mother added this good news.
People asked her at the gathering of relatives on Chusok. How did she think she were going to be a teacher, how did she make that choice so she would come up to this. How was it possible to continue without any hesitating.

She answered.
“I had a conversation with my cousin Kenneth Lee. Whenever I wanted to quit because I was having a hard time, I thought about what we’d talked before that about what I was doing and what I liked best and what I would like to do."

My mother told me that she was proud of me because I had such a great influence on her.
I was proud of her because she did not forget my opinion and practiced it very well.
I’m sure that she will continue to live a happy life in the future.
Because we know how to get through the dark night.


A Poem

Listen to your inner mind when you have to get through the dark night with being tired and exhausted
There is a star floating in it.
Whatever happens, it will reveal the way you go.

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About Author

Hello, I’m Kenneth Lee. I'm a business man who live in South Korea and America. I work in the software company "Deduction Theory, LLC" as CEO.
I work with my younger brother Chase Lee. We study Logic, Mathematics, Science, and computer information theory subject. This blog is for explaining the other people about our study.
We also working on an open source computer programming education project, Rellat. I'm looking for a translating volunteer for this project. I think this project will help many children, students, adults who are living in all around world, especially low income people. This project is free for everyone. It's designed for helping people. I will also make schools and orphanages in low income countries to teach the kids computer programming for they can have a better job.
Please visit the web page below that introduces Rellat project and tell me if you think that is worthy to give your help.
Introducing Rellat: Open Source and Open Study Project 
There are Korean and English contents in this projects for translating to the other languages. I wrote all of them originally. So you can choose English or Korean from the original contents to translate whether you want.
We are opened to every language in the world. Thank you.
Hello. I'm Chase Lee who is working on Rellat Project with Kenneth Lee.
When I was a child, I used to make animation with adobe flash program. Then I wanted to make a game with it, so I start coding with action script. That was the first time I started programming.
The methodology of Deduction Theory is the same as the way I do my usual work.
In fact, when I look at the code that goes over 500 lines, I have no sense and I can not remember all of them. Even these days, I still can not remember some of simple code syntax, so I often google it.
Instead, I keep track of what kind of thinking the code was made in, and what relativity information it uses. This is a coding methodology, a coding style or a computing perspective in Deduction Theory
By understanding how to think, you can compare how handling information better. This is the essence, and the most important thing.
The remaining space in the program can be filled by the power of Google and stack overflow.
I think you also can do a massive high-quality information processing by this way without confusing into new technologies and tens of thousands of lines of codes that are constantly being created.

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